Dear self,

I've been contented with my life and what I have. But sometimes I can't help but to make that little bit of comparison and sometimes I wonder to myself "I think I deserve a little bit of that." or "I wonder how does it feels like to receive a pleasant surprise in xxx's shoes."

I can't help, really, to not compare. Some blame the social media for setting up expectations, some blame others who spoil the market. I have been blaming both the former and the latter but in the end, I too, have myself to blame - for being so unappreciative and not being contented enough with what I have. Call it greed, call it demanding, but I have always wanted to have a life of abundance in terms of every single thing. 

Looking back, yes. I WAS contented but I guess as time passes, things change, demands change. They also say, every individual is unique and you cannot make comparisons, but I cannot help but to look at everyone around me being pleasantly surprised one by one, and I'm just here waiting, and waiting, and waiting for something miraculous to happen.

I can just continue waiting...